


Cause what is simple in the moonlight by the morning never is

by space_ally



Category: Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Adoption, Also kind of, Angst with a Happy Ending, Aziraphale's Bookshop, Crowley's Fall, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Homophobia, Hurt/Comfort, Kind of AU, LGBTQ, M/M, Mentions of homophobia, Much Ado About Nothing, Other, Safe Space, Shakespeare, Theatre, discussions of lgbtq themes, ineffable parents, kind of, non-binary characters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-18
Updated: 2020-01-18
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:07:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,806
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22278364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/space_ally/pseuds/space_ally
Summary: The demon was in love with the angel and vice versa.But why?Much Ado About Nothing inspired.Written for the 2019/2020 Good Omens Big Bang
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 17
Kudos: 34
Collections: Good Omens Big Bang 2019





	Cause what is simple in the moonlight by the morning never is

**Author's Note:**

> Beta'd by Fafsernir & Justthingstbh
> 
> Art by Catwitharibbonandsword (Instagram)  
> https://www.instagram.com/catwitharibbonandsword
> 
> Title from Lua by Bright Eyes

Crowley held onto the box of flyers in his arms tighter, kicking the doors of the van behind him shut. He almost dropped it, however, when he turned around to face his next-door neighbour, the owner of a very packed but rather lovely bookshop, Aziraphale. A.Z. Fell. Aziraphale Fell? Crowley wasn’t exactly sure because they never really introduced themselves. Then again, he had only opened up this place like two weeks ago and had been rather busy. 

“Hello, dear. What a strange time to meet you outside. Can I give you a hand?”, the blonde asked, offering to take the box from Crowley.

“Strange time?”, the demon asked, keeping the box in his arms but nodding in the direction of the door to the small theatre. Aziraphale understood and opened it for him, following him inside afterwards. The angel took a look around the lobby. He remembered the unfurnished look from before, remembered the colour on the walls chipping off, the spare lighting from a single light bulb. 

All of that had changed now, the walls were painted in a deeply saturated red, LED lights and strings with fairy lights as well as cushioned benches making the place feel much more homely. 

“Yes, so far I’ve only really seen you outside during night hours, I was starting to wonder if you were a vampire perhaps. I’m Aziraphale. Your neighbour. The bookshop, err, next door, it’s mine,” his eyes fell on the rainbow flag on one of the doors leading to the back rooms. 

Aziraphale shifted his weight from one leg to the other awkwardly while Crowley sat down the box. 

“Haven’t gotten around to checking out your shop, sorry. I’m Crowley. A.J. Crowley.”

He offered his hand to the angel, who took it with both of his, a warm embrace, and shook it excitedly. Crowley cleared his throat, avoiding the other man’s eyes and praying to Satan to let the blush creeping up his neck vanish so Aziraphale wouldn't see it. 

“A pleasure to meet you. I’m glad someone is breathing life back into this building, it was such a depressing place! Oh, is that a flyer for a play? Do you mind me-”, the blonde reached for one of the flyers in the box but Crowley almost stumbled over his own legs trying to stop him.

“No, I mean, yes but-”

The angel already managed to get ahold of one and read through it.

“Queer theatre. Safe space for members of the LGBTQ community. Weekly workshops for writing, acting and improv theatre.”

Crowley wished a hole would open up in the ground and swallow him. He hid his face in his hands. 

Aziraphale’s face lit up. He reached for his inner coat pocket and took out a worn piece of paper that he gave to Crowley. 

_A.Z. Fell’s bookshop. LGBTQ brunch every Wednesday. Bring your favourite book._

“I’m afraid it’s not as stylish as yours but it does the job of spreading the word”, the angel answered and smiled and Crowley was sure he’d never seen anyone more beautiful in all his years of existence. 

“You’re obviously invited to join us!”, Aziraphale added and pulled on his waistcoat to busy his hands somehow. Then, he turned around, not sure if he should leave or stay. 

“I can help you with that!”, Crowley offered before he could stop himself. He combed through his hair awkwardly, waiting for the angel’s response. Aziraphale turned back around.

“With what exactly?”, he asked the demon, before his eyes fell upon the piece of paper that Crowley quite fondly held onto, “Oh the flyers you mean! That would be appreciated, yes, I’d love that. I can pay you back in hot cocoa and biscuits. Just come over when you’re free!”

Aziraphale smiled brightly and Crowley felt his heart skip a beat. He nodded, dumbfoundedly and was still nodding when the angel had left his place already. 

*

Crowley let the next Wednesday go by without following Aziraphale’s invitation, instead, he busied himself in preparations for the opening night of his theatre. They had to find a last-minute stand in for one of the secondary actors, there were electricity issues during dress rehearsal and tickets still hadn't arrived, even though he had yelled at four different employees of the company responsible of delivery. He told himself he simply didn’t have the time to attend a brunch. 

He definitely didn’t expect Aziraphale barging in through the front door, holding on to the very bruised up secondary character they had been trying to find a replacement for, since he had missed the last three rehearsals.

“What in Satan’s name-”, the demon asked, rushing towards them, easing the boy, Liam, onto the small sofa in the lobby. He kneeled down in front of him and took a look at his injuries, turned to Aziraphale and back to Liam. 

“What happened to you?”

Aziraphale gave Crowley a meaningful look and steered him away from the boy who was leaning against the wall, closing his eyes, a painful expression on his face. 

“Found him outside. Apparently his father is not a very kind individual. Or supportive of who he brought home. He’s got nowhere to go. I mean, he can stay at my place, I just thought you should know, he’s very worried about the performance and everything.”

Aziraphale noticed Crowley’s expression change from a worried one to an angry one and took his arm to stop him from wherever he was going to storm off to. 

“I know you’re angry but violence doesn’t solve the problem. That’s not how we solve problems in this community.”

“He can stay here. There’re three more kids sharing the backroom currently”, Crowley answered and went back to Liam to take a closer look at his injuries. Aziraphale followed him, clearly taken by surprise.

“How are you, kid?”, the demon asked the teenager who opened his eyes again. A sad smile crossed his face. 

“I shouldn’t be surprised. It’ll take some getting used to, though.”

Crowley bit his bottom lip and pulled the boy into a short but warm embrace. 

“Gwen will show you around. Make yourself at home. I’ll be with you in a bit, try and see if you can get those cuts cleaned, I’ll bring pain killers and stuff, okay?”, his voice was gentle and soft, the complete opposite of what he seemed to be as a person. Aziraphale shifted his weight from one leg to the other, not sure what to do. 

Liam nodded, squeezed Crowley’s hand thankfully and left, not without giving Aziraphale a grateful nod. The angel smiled back at him, before he sat down on the sofa Crowley had let himself fall onto already. He suddenly looked very tired, his sunglasses not able to hide it. 

“I don’t understand. He’s not doing anything bad. Hell, he could be doing drugs or cocaine or-”, Crowley rambled on. 

“Cocaine is also a drug, dear”, the angel mentioned but the demon just waved it off. 

They sat in silence for a bit. 

“What play are you showing tomorrow?”, Aziraphale suddenly asked and Crowley visibly relaxed, though his mind was still in a different place. 

“Oh, I don’t know, really. Gwen wrote it. Apparently there are lesbians in it. They’re very excited.”

Aziraphale nodded, then asked “Do you mind if I come see it?” 

Crowley looked at him. “Do I mind? Of course not, this is a theatre, we kind of want people to come see our plays! Proceeds go towards the kids, though. They decide where the money is needed, I’m just… I handle everything business related and keep the small-minded idiots away.”

The angel nodded in understanding.

“I should go and check on Liam,” Crowley said, getting up. Aziraphale followed him in doing so, clearing his throat. “I suppose I should get going, then. I’ll see you the day after tomorrow, for the premiere?” 

“Yes, yes definitely. And thank you for bringing him here. Before, you know…” 

Aziraphale put a hand on Crowley’s arm and squeezed it lightly. “You’re welcome. See you soon, dear,” he replied and left, not without flashing the demon another warm smile. 

“Be still, my heart,” Crowley whispered, his eyes following the angel until he was out of sight.

*

Opening night was a rush Crowley didn’t expect. Everything went by so fast, like flashing lights, memories, faces, sounds, the curtain, a blur of memories and the night was far from over. At one point during the night he felt a hand pull him out of his seat and stumbled down the steps to the stage in confusion, where Gwen proudly declared “And we want to thank Anthony over here for giving us the opportunity to do what we love. Without him, all of this wouldn’t have been possible. Thank you. From all of us.”

The demon blushed and dumbfoundedly hugged them back before being able to calm down again, back in his seat. The applause thundered over them like rain in the small theatre and then, people began to move, making their way to the foyer for drinks and socialising. Crowley felt a tap on his shoulder and turned around to see Aziraphale, visibly dressed up in a white suit with a black shirt, be the cause. 

“You made it!” Crowley exclaimed, happier than what he deemed appropriate. He bit his tongue before he could say something dumb.

“Of course I did! Let me get you a drink, dear,” the angel replied and Crowley gladly accepted his offer. 

They were leaning against the bar, Crowley sipping on his third glass of red wine, Aziraphale’s eyes glimmering and cheeks reddened after his fourth glass of white wine. 

“You never mentioned that your name was Anthony!” the angel noticed and drew careless symbols on the condensed part of his glass, eyes locked on Crowley’s. The demon took another sip of wine and held the liquid in his mouth for longer than necessary. “You don’t like it?” 

“No, no! I’ll get used to it.”

They were interrupted by three to four young adults almost tackling Crowley with a hug. 

“Okay, okay!” he tried to break free but couldn’t hide the smile on his lips. 

“Thank you, thank you, thank you!” Liam said, still hugging the demon, followed by Gwen’s “We all love you for what you’re doing.”

“Yeah, I’ll remind you of that tomorrow morning, when there’s cleaning up to do,” Crowley snarled and Aziraphale laughed. They let go of Crowley who downed the rest of his wine, almost choking on it when Gwen asked “So when are you going to introduce us to your boyfriend?” pointing at Aziraphale. 

“Lord Satan,” he coughed, using a tiny demonic intervention to stop himself from spitting the wine all over the place. Aziraphale gasped in shock and the kids alternated between looking at the angel and the demon. 

“Ahem. I’m Aziraphale. I own the bookshop next door. If you ever fancy a brunch and a chat about your favourite books, you’re all invited to join us. Me. I mean. Crowley hasn’t so far. Though I hope he will.”

The demon was glad he was out of wine so he couldn’t choke on it again.

“I was kind of busy with preparations and-” he started, but was interrupted by Liam. 

“We’ll drag him along, don’t worry.”

They left and an uncomfortable silence settled in. 

“A very interesting play, I gotta say,” Aziraphale tried his best to get rid of it and Crowley nodded. 

“They did so well, I’m proud of them. I hope the next few evenings it’s running will be as successful as today.”

“Oh, I’m sure they’ll all come back and introduce other people to it. I just know it,” the angel winked at the demon whose heartbeat sped up. He cleared his throat, looking at his empty glass absentmindedly. He decided to get himself another drink but Aziraphale was faster than him and took the empty one from him, brushing over his hand in doing so and Crowley let go of the glass in shock. 

Miraculously it didn’t shatter upon meeting the ground and Aziraphale just went to pick it up without a comment. 

Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck. 

Crowley definitely had a crush on his neighbour. 

“Here you go, dear,” the blonde said and held out another glass of wine and Crowley’s hands were shaking lightly, when he took it, careful, not to repeat what had happened earlier. “Thank you. Sorry about, well, you know.”

The angel waved it off. “So I can expect to see you on Wednesday next week?” he asked instead. 

“I don’t really… Read that much. Apart from plays. I don’t know if I would be any good at a book club…”

Aziraphale put a hand on Crowley’s free one and the demon swallowed hard. “Oh, that’s alright! I’ll introduce you to some of my favourites!”

Then he smiled so brightly, Crowley was convinced he could see stars. Prettier than the ones he had helped create. 

*

Crowley was closing up the building, checking the doors and taking a last walk around. Aziraphale had left about ten minutes ago, after they had spent a good hour discussing plays. At some point they had wandered off, outside, the night air cool and welcoming, clearing their heads from the alcohol. 

When they had said their goodbyes, Aziraphale had flashed him another blinding smile and the demon had to use all his willpower to not fall over because of his legs giving in. 

His cheeks burned in embarrassment, thinking back on it, when something outside the building caught his attention. He closed the door behind him, checking twice if it was properly locked and made his way over to the small group that stood in front of the theatre. It was mostly made up of middle-aged men and two or three women and they didn’t look friendly.

“Can I help you?” he asked curtly. One of the men stepped forward. He was almost taller than Crowley, almost. 

“I know my son is staying with you.”

The demon took a deep breath. “Yes. And he will be staying with me since he’s clearly not safe staying with you.”

“You disgusting, minor-seducing fuck will let me take my son home or else-” the man growled but Crowley didn’t care. 

“Or else?” he asked, raising an eyebrow provokingly. There was a hand around his neck suddenly and he felt himself being raised up. 

“Or I’ll burn this place to the ground and make sure you won’t be able to escape the fire.”

For a demon, Crowley sucked ass at fighting, he noticed, feeling the hit to the stomach before he toppled over, landing face-first on the ground. “Go and get my son.”

Crowley got back on his feet. “No,” he replied and saw stars a second time that night.

*

The demon regained consciousness slowly but suddenly all at once, jerking up and looking around himself, not recognising his surroundings. He didn’t calm down when Aziraphale’s face got into focus. 

“Careful, dear. Don’t move too fast, I’m not sure if you’re okay.” 

“Are they safe?”

Aziraphale’s worried expression softened. “Yes. They’re alright. These people are not coming back. I made sure of that.”

A new kind of panic rose in Crowley’s chest as he checked Aziraphale for injuries. “Are you okay?” he asked and couldn’t stop his hands from reaching out for the angel. He noticed what he was doing and quickly withdrew his hands. 

“I’m fine. Now please sit back down on the sofa and let me take a look at you. Are you feeling dizzy or anything?” 

The demon followed Aziraphale’s order and sat down and felt the angel’s hands cupping his face. They were so close to each other, their noses were almost touching and Crowley definitely wasn’t able to ignore that. He tried to focus his attention on something, anything else but got sidetracked by the angel’s eyes.

“Crowley!” 

“Huh?”

Aziraphale sighed and carefully brushed over the bruise on the demon’s eye with his thumb and the pain suddenly stopped. “I was asking if you’re feeling dizzy.”

“Yes,” Crowley breathed out but he was sure it had more to do with the other man’s face mere centimetres away from his own than his injuries. It would be so easy to just lean forward and get a taste of these perfect lips, drown in those eyes and dive into his touch. Crowley blinked upon realising his thoughts and his cheeks lit up in response. 

“This could definitely be a concussion, my dear,” the angel said letting go off him and he almost fell over, his heart aching in protest. 

“I can’t get concussions, I’m a demon,” Crowley blurted out, still grieving over losing the angel’s touch. It took him a minute to comprehend what he just said and he felt his stomach drop. 

“What?” Aziraphale asked, paling. 

“I gotta go,” Crowley rushed to say and got up, his movements sloppy. Maybe he did have a concussion. He ignored it and fled the room that turned out to be the backroom of Aziraphale’s bookstore. 

*

Aziraphale stayed up all night. Replaying Crowley’s words in his mind over and over again. Suddenly the feeling of uneasiness he had felt ever since the new neighbour moving in made sense. However, Aziraphale was still confused. 

Demons were supposed to be evil. But Crowley was kind.

Aziraphale was supposed to be repelled by evil. But he was drawn to Crowley.

He was supposed to fight evil. But he couldn’t bring himself to stop thinking about Crowley.

“Fuck,” he whispered, “Fuck.”

*

“You idiot, you dumb idiot. Not only did you manage to fall in love with a mortal, no, you also told him you’re a demon! He’s never gonna talk to you again, he’ll probably think you’re batshit crazy,” the demon cursed himself. He groaned into his pillow. 

A soft knock on his door made him jump up, a tiny part of him hoping it would be his neighbour standing in front of it. Instead, it was Liam. 

“Sorry, didn’t mean to interrupt or anything. Can we talk?”

The demon straightened his back and nodded. Liam entered the room and sat down at the foot of the bed. 

“What happened to your eye?” the twenty-year-old asked upon seeing the bruise around Crowley’s right eye. The demon got aware of the fact that he wasn’t wearing his sunglasses but the spare lighting by the street light outside hid his eyes pretty well so he didn’t bother looking for them. 

“Nothing really,” he replied. His mind was still thinking about his sunglasses, he didn’t remember wearing them back in Aziraphale’s bookshop which could only mean that the man had seen him without them. Just as he thought it couldn’t get worse. 

“It was my Dad, wasn’t it? They were pretty loud. Gwen stopped me from going outside. They said… They said you were used to situations like these?”

Crowley smiled sadly and nodded. 

“The most important thing is to not look for whatever you did wrong because you didn’t do anything wrong, okay? There is nothing wrong with you. I want you to know that, okay? You don’t deserve to be treated like that and I’m so sorry you had to go through that,” the demon said. Liam bit his bottom lip and turned away. 

“Can you repeat that for me? You don’t deserve to be treated like that. There’s nothing wrong with you. Liam. I’m serious.”

The boy shrugged lightly, then gave in. “I don’t deserve to be treated like that. There’s nothing wrong with me.” 

The demon smiled at him. “Thank you.”

“You still got hurt, because of me.”

Crowley felt his heart sink. Again. Liam looked so miserable and heartbroken and he could understand why. And yet he wanted nothing but to make sure no one ever had to feel like that again. 

He got up and hugged Liam. 

“It’s going to be okay. It might not look like it, but it will be. We’re a family here and we look out for each other.” Liam had tears in his eyes when they let go of each other. 

“Thank you. Thank you so much.”

“Anytime, kid. I’m always here, if you need to talk to someone.”

The boy nodded, thanked him again and left, his steps a little lighter, a little more confident. And Crowley was thankful as well. 

He would always be here. The kids wouldn’t because they were going to age and maybe marry, start families, make their own safe space, but he would always be here. 

*

It was Wednesday. Aziraphale wanted to give Crowley some space and apparently the demon didn’t seem to mind, considering he avoided meeting him at all costs. The angel needed the space as well, to think about how to continue this. He had knowledge of a demon living next door. He was supposed to let headquarters know. He couldn’t bring himself to care, though.

He took the tea kettle from the stove, when he heard the front door opening and closing. “I’ll be with you in a minute!” he let his customers know and straightened his bow tie before he came to greet whoever seemed to join him on this brunch. He recognised the face instantly.

“Gwen, was it? Nice to meet you again, are you here for the brunch?”

The young adult nodded and gifted the angel an apologetic smile, “We tried to get Anthony to join us but he said something about a headache or something.”

Part of Aziraphale was disappointed. He decided to ignore that part and stored it away, deep, deep down because he really shouldn’t be disappointed over the demon next door not making it to his brunch.

“It’s fine, it’s fine. Did you bring friends?” 

Gwen nodded and turned around to check on their friends approaching. “Liam is definitely joining us with his boyfriend, Cara and maybe Violet as well. Do you have many people joining you here?”

Aziraphale showed Gwen where to put their coat. “We’re a small bunch of people, maybe ten, twelve on busy days. It’s comfortable. Did you bring a book, my dear?” 

Gwen nodded excitedly and revealed the title of the book in their hands, it was _Perfume_ by Patrick Süskind. 

“Dark. But interesting,” the angel replied and showed them the way to the back room, where a small group of people was already involved in conversations. 

“Just my type,” Gwen replied, nodding in the direction of Violet, who had just entered the store. 

“Oh! I see!” Aziraphale laughed and winked at Gwen who laughed as well. “Hello, dear, nice to meet you! Glad you could make it,” the angel greeted the woman in goth attire who smiled awkwardly. 

“Gwen told me about this. I hope you don’t mind,” she replied and directed a beaming smile at Gwen who smoothed out their hair, not sure how to busy their hands. 

“Absolutely not! The more, the merrier!” Aziraphale clapped his hands in excitement “I showed Gwen where to put coats and stuff, the back room is just straight ahead. Get comfortable, tea will be done in a minute or so.”

More people came in and Aziraphale turned around in excitement to see Liam, the young man whose hand he held and… Crowley?

“Hi, Mr. Fell. This is Alex,” Liam introduced his boyfriend. 

“Nice to meet you, my dear. The backroom is-” 

“Yeah, we heard, thank you,” Liam stopped the angel mid-sentence and pulled Alex along so that only Crowley and Aziraphale were left in the front. The angel cleared his throat while the demon hid his hands in his pockets. 

“They wouldn’t leave without me…” he mumbled, avoiding Aziraphale’s eyes. 

“I’m glad you’re here. I’ve been meaning to talk to you.”

Crowley lifted his head, a shocked expression on his face. “Why?”

“I have some ideas for the next play you could show. I wanted to discuss them with you, see if you liked any of them. Maybe try and get involved. If you want my help.”

The demon looked suspicious, “You still want me around?”

There was a long silence and it almost felt like the world held its breath. 

“Of course, why wouldn’t I? Come on, join me in the kitchen, dear. The tea should be ready.”

And the world exhaled. And so did Crowley. 

*

“Okay but it could work,” Aziraphale said. Crowley crossed his arms in front of his chest and shook his head. 

“You want us to go through the entire play and completely change it up. There’s play where we don’t have to do that, why would we do that to ourselves?”

They were sitting scattered around the stage, surrounded by the kids who stayed longer after brunch had ended. 

“Because it’s Much Ado about Nothing!” Gwen chimed in. 

“That’s not an argument!” Crowley said and Alex replied “But it’s Shakespeare!”

“There you have your argument,” Aziraphale concluded, satisfied. Crowley hissed an answer. “Sorry, what was that, my dear?” 

“Fine. I said fine. We’re showing Much Ado about Nothing.”

“But queer!” Liam yelled from across the room. 

“Did you even listen to anything we discussed?” Gwen asked the boy who was concentrating on a book. 

He shook his head. “I just like adding but queer,” he answered and managed to make Crowley laugh.

*

Crowley stood backstage with Aziraphale and still couldn’t believe it. They hadn’t really talked about the evening Crowley had made his fateful confession and he wasn’t sure if he should bring it up again or let it be, he definitely didn’t want to risk losing Aziraphale’s presence though.

“I think we can shorten act four a little, don’t you think?” the angel asked and tore the demon from his thoughts. 

“Sorry?”

“I don’t think we need that much of Dogberry, the play is mainly about Benedick and Beatrice, as well as Hero and Claudio, we should keep the focus on the lovers perhaps,” Aziraphale explained patiently and pointed out a paragraph in the book he was holding. 

“What a gorgeous copy you got, I never noticed before,” Crowley took a closer look. The angel panicked and closed it quickly. 

“Everything alright?”

Aziraphale nodded hastily. “We shouldn’t talk during rehearsal though. It’s rude.” Crowley shook his head, laughing. 

“I’ve seen this scene about eight times in the last half hour. It’s fine. They can’t hear us on stage anyway. Tell them to take a break, will you? I’m going to get water and some snacks.” 

He left and Aziraphale made his way onto the stage to let the kids know. 

“Liam and I are gonna go help carry!” Alex volunteered and pulled his boyfriend along who didn’t seem to mind. Aziraphale sat down with the remaining actors, including Gwen and Violet who were going to play Benedick and Beatrice. 

“I gotta say, you’re doing a fantastic job. Shakespeare would be proud to see this adaption,” the angel said and he meant it but of course, they didn’t know. 

“I’m not sure he would be too happy about us making this play this… Well. Gay,” Violet pulled on a thread of her costume. 

“He’d enjoy it a lot. Trust me,” Aziraphale simply said “I’m gonna check on the boys, rest. You did great!”

The angel was almost out of the room and he definitely didn’t plan on eavesdropping but he couldn’t believe his ears when he heard Gwen say: “He’s head over heels. Liam caught him the other night sulking because he thought he fucked things up.”

“It’s kind of adorable, isn’t it?” Violet replied, “I’ve never seen Anthony like this before. Who knew the bookshop owner would be his type? They’re so different!”

The angel felt his heart skip a beat. Crowley was… Interested in him? He shook his head, sure he must have interpreted that wrong and left. A demon. In love with an angel. Which he still didn’t know. But still. Ridiculous. 

*

Crowley was on his way back up the stairs when he almost stumbled over Alex and Liam. “Didn’t Aziraphale tell you to take a break? What are you doing here?” he asked them. Alex took the water from him. 

“We came to help with carrying.”

Crowley tried to stop himself from smiling but couldn’t. “That’s very considerate. Thanks, guys.”

“We got this,” Liam replied and shooed him up the stairs. “You go and take a look at act five, scene two, I edited it down a little and want your opinion.”

Crowley nodded and walked back up the stairs. He was almost out of the lobby when he heard Alex ask: “Okay but seriously. Aziraphale has a _huge_ crush on him, doesn’t he?” 

Liam laughed, “Shh. Don’t be ridiculous. They’re old enough to be our Dads!” 

“Well, yeah, Dads who are absolutely in love with each other!” 

“Shut up.”

Could it be? Could Aziraphale return his feelings? The demon shook his head, dismissing the thought. He almost crashed into Aziraphale on the way back to the rehearsal room. 

“Weren’t you going to get drinks?” Aziraphale asked, a little dishevelled. 

“The boys got it, Liam wants me to take a look at his edit.”

“Ah. I see.”

They awkwardly stood around for a minute. 

“Should we go back inside?” Crowley suggested and Aziraphale nodded. 

“Fantastic idea, my dear. After you.”

Violet had picked her scene back up and stood in the middle of the stage, Gwen in the audience, watching her. 

“They love me…” Violet declared to an invisible audience and let a good twenty seconds go by before she pulled a face asking: “Why?”

Aziraphale turned his head to Crowley who did the exact same thing by accident. They both turned away in embarrassment quickly and if anyone hadn’t seen them doing so, the blush on both their cheeks was unmistakable. 

The demon was in love with the angel and vice versa. 

But why?

*

They were done with rehearsals for the day and the kids started messing around with lights and sound. They said they wanted to get to know the areas behind the scenes as well but both Crowley and Aziraphale knew they wanted to play around with the soundboard. And neither of them minded, they had a very productive day behind them, they deserved the break. 

The angel and the demon sat in the first row, casually chatting when Liam flicked the switch for the lights. Everything was dark apart from Gwen and Violet, who were sitting in the middle of the stage, too deep in conversation to really notice. 

“Sorry!” Liam used the microphone. His eyes lit up. “That is a fantastic sound system. Can we, like, test that a little?”

Crowley turned in his seat to look at the young adult questioningly. 

“Gwen has _got_ to sing something, they have the most amazing voice!” Upon hearing their name, Gwen turned to look at Liam as well, shaking their head, a blush creeping up their neck. 

“Come on. Please. There’s a mic right over there. I want to feel like a fancy sound manager, please?”

Gwen was still shaking their head, when Violet looked at them and repeated Liam’s ‘Please?’ quietly.

“Fine!” Gwen yelled back “But I’m not doing it alone. You guys are joining in.”

Violet giggled in delight and Alex almost fell over the seats on his way from the sound director room. Aziraphale looked at Crowley questioningly. “Oh, hell, I’m not singing. No way.”

“We’ll sit this one out,” Aziraphale told Gwen who rolled their eyes. “Okay, get ready, guys! As your director, I should tell you where you stand and-”

“Shut up!” came it in unison from Alex, Gwen and Violet. Crowley disguised his laughter as a cough. 

“You’re no fun,” Liam complained and put a spotlight on the small group. He was still adjusting the volume, when Gwen already started. 

“ _Well, I woke up to the sound of silence the cars, were cutting like knives in a fistfight_ ,” they sang, not entirely comfortable. Alex grabbed himself a mic and joined in: “ _And I found you with a bottle of wine, your head in the curtains and heart like the fourth of July._ ”

Violet smiled and leaned closer to Gwen to accompany both of them. 

“ _You swore and said we are not, we are not shining stars. This I know, I never said we are. Though I've never been through hell like that, I've closed enough windows to know you can never look back._ ”

Aziraphale was completely captivated by the performance while Crowley’s eyes laid on him. The three singers’ voices definitely got more powerful with the next verse. 

“ _If you're lost and alone or you're sinking like a stone, carry on. May your past be the sound of your feet upon the ground, carry on._ ”

They were all grinning when they huddled together to sing “ _Carry on, carry on!_ ”

“They’re fantastic! You should let them sing more often, Crowley!” Aziraphale whispered and almost bumped noses with the demon, when he turned his face towards him. 

“Yes, you’re right,” Crowley replied and bit his tongue. Aziraphale cleared his throat and turned his eyes back to the stage. 

“ _So I met up with some friends in the edge of the night at a bar off seventy-five and we talked and talked about how our parents will die, all our neighbours and wives. But I like to think I can cheat it all to make up for the times, I've been cheated on and it's nice to know, when I was left for dead, I was found and now I don't roam these streets. I am not the ghost you want of me._ ”

Crowley took a shuddering breath, looking back at the small group of people on stage as well. 

“ _If you're lost and alone or you're sinking like a stone, carry on. May your past be the sound of your feet upon the ground and carry on._ ”

This time, Aziraphale was the one to turn away from the performance to study the demon’s face closer. The feeling of uneasiness hadn’t left him, there was a tightness in his chest whenever he spent time with Crowley, and they were spending a lot of time together at the moment, considering he was co-directing their new play. 

“ _Woah my head is on fire but my legs are fine. After all they are mine. Lay your clothes down on the floor, close the door, hold the phone, show me how. No one's ever gonna stop us now._ ”

Heaven hadn’t checked in with him in a while which made it easier as he didn’t feel like he was lying to his superiors but rather… Busy. They trusted him and there really was no reason not to. He was a loyal angel. Had been for the last 6000 years.

“ _'Cause we are, we are shining stars. We are invincible. We are who we are. On our darkest day, when we're miles away, so we'll come, we will find our way home._ ”

Crowley was tapping his fingers on the armrest and Aziraphale didn’t really think when he put his hand above the demon’s. 

“ _If you're lost and alone, or you're sinking like a stone, carry on._ ”

Crowley looked at the angel, clearly confused. 

“ _May your past be the sound of your feet upon the ground and carry on._ ”

Aziraphale just smiled and squeezed his hand. And Crowley smiled back. 

*

Aziraphale and Crowley were sitting on the roof of the theatre building. You couldn’t really call it star-gazing, considering light-pollution in London made it almost impossible to see the stars. Aziraphale, however, worked a tiny miracle just for the demon next to him.

They were sharing a bottle of wine and when the demon finally looked upwards, his expression changed from a calm one to a conflicted one. He let himself fall back to get a better look and Aziraphale shuffled over until he sat across from him. 

“Are you okay?” the angel asked, growing worried when the demon didn’t reply. It took him a while to spot the tears running down Crowley’s cheeks, the sunglasses hid them too well. 

“I helped create them. Before I fell,” he whispered, so quiet, no mortal would have been able to understand, especially over the sound of London traffic. But Aziraphale was no mortal. And it suddenly hit him.

“You were an angel once,” he said out loud what was only meant for the privacy of his own thoughts. Crowley’s mouth fell open when Aziraphale threw his hands on his own. 

“You believe me?” the demon asked, voice a little husky. The angel laid down next to the demon and joined him on watching the stars.

“A marvellous job,” he said and meant it. 

“No mortal ever believed me. Not that I go around telling people but-” Crowley was facing Aziraphale now. 

“Maybe because I’m not a mortal. I should have told you sooner, I’m sorry.” 

“You’re a demon as well?!”

Aziraphale sat upright in shock, shaking his head “I’m an angel!”

He was even more shocked when he heard Crowley bursting into laughter. Outraged, he stared at the demon still lying on the rooftop. “Excuse me, I don’t see what’s so funny about that!”

Crowley wiped a tear from his eyes. “The thought of an angel hanging out with a demon. Shouldn’t you, I don’t know, try to kill me or something?”

“Should I?” the angel asked, eyes widening in shock. He hadn’t even thought about that, his worst-case scenario was being forced to avoid all contact with Crowley. Would heaven want him to kill the demon?

He felt panic closing up his throat and Crowley suddenly noticed the change in atmosphere. He got up and put his hands on Aziraphale’s cheeks, looked him into his eyes, his sunglasses carelessly thrown aside. 

“Hey, no need to panic, come on. Aziraphale. Breathe. Calm down. Everything is alright. Are you listening? Aziraphale? Angel?”

“Should I?” the angel asked the demon, again, eyes shimmering with tears he didn’t let himself cry until he couldn’t anymore and they ran over his cheeks and Crowley wanted nothing more than to kiss them away.

“No,” the demon wanted to say. Wanted to tell him everything was going to be alright. But there was this feeling, twisting his stomach. He had caused this panic. It was his fault. And as long as he was a demon and Aziraphale was an angel, he would always cause this panic. 

As long as they continued to see each other. 

He let go of the angel as if he got burned, stumbling backwards. 

“I… I don’t know,” he said and Aziraphale looked at him, shaking his head before disappearing. And the starlight dimmed, the night sky taking back what belonged to no one anymore. 

*

“Oh, is Aziraphale not attending rehearsals today?”, Alex asked his boyfriend who shook his head and kissed his cheek to greet him. 

Liam ruffled his dark brown hair and looked over to where Crowley was standing, staring at nothing. “I don’t know what happened yesterday but he’s been quiet all day. I hope they’re not fighting or anything.”

“Maybe we should just ask him,” Alex suggested but Liam stopped him, shaking his head. Violet entered the room, a bright smile on her lips. 

“Good morning, gays, isn’t it a fantastic day?” she greeted them, her smile fading upon seeing Crowley. “What’s going on with him? Did he and Mr Fell break up?”

Liam turned around in shock, “Do you think they broke up?” 

Alex pulled a face. “I don’t think they were a couple in the first place. By the way, has anyone seen the guy who’s playing Don Pedro? I lent him a pen yesterday and he took it home with him.”

“Is the pen what’s important right now, darling?” Liam asked, looking at his boyfriend questioningly. 

“It’s a good pen. Where is everyone anyway? There’s at least four people missing, including our Benedick.”

Gwen threw their bag in a free seat and joined the small group. “You’re late,” Violet noticed. 

“I stopped by at the bookshop on my way, I left my book last Wednesday. Aziraphale was being all weird and quiet today though.”

“So they did have a fight,” Liam concluded, “We have to fix this.”

“We shouldn’t get mixed up in other people’s business, Liam. And we should definitely start rehearsing. You keep fucking up your lines,” Alex replied, gently nudging his boyfriend in the direction of the stage. 

“It’s freezing in here today,” Gwen said. “If you ask me, that’s Mr Crowley’s doing,” Violet took Gwen’s hand and pulled them along. 

The air got even colder when Claudio asked Hero to marry him. 

“Someone has to talk to him!” Gwen complained, trying to get their hands to warm up by rubbing them together. Violet took a step back, “To be completely honest, he scares me a little.”

Alex and Liam left the stage as they were done with their scene, chatting on the way backstage. “No, I think that worked well, we should work on cutting back on gesturing though,” Liam said and Alex nodded, “That was kind of just to stay warm. Or, I don’t know, less cold.”

“Liam or Gwen. You two know him the longest!” Violet declared and the two young adults looked at her as if she had lost her mind, then at each other. 

“You talk to Crowley, I’ll talk to Aziraphale,” Gwen gave in. 

“Do I get a say in this?” the boy asked but earned a collective ‘No’ from everyone around. 

*

Gwen knocked on the door to the bookshop softly. “We’re closed!” Aziraphale replied from somewhere inside, not even checking who was outside. 

“It’s me, Gwen!” the young adult called back and after about two minutes, the angel opened the door. 

“God, you must be freezing, come on inside, dear,” he said and let them in. They stood around in the front of the shop awkwardly for a bit, neither of them really sure what to say. At least it was notably warmer in the bookshop compared to outside, or worse, the rehearsal room.

“What brings you here, dear?” the blonde asked and offered to take Gwen’s coat from them, which they accepted, smiling gratefully. 

“It’s about Anthony.”

Aziraphale almost let the coat fall on the floor but managed to pull himself together last minute. “I don’t know what you mean by that, I’m sorry.”

Gwen sighed. Aziraphale hung up the coat and turned back to Gwen and, upon seeing their face, sighed as well. “I might know what you mean by that. Come on, let’s sit down together. I’ll make tea.”

They both welcomed the mugs, Gwen to regain feeling in their fingers after the cold and Aziraphale to have something to hold onto. They sat in the backroom, Gwen on the sofa, Aziraphale in the armchair facing the sofa. 

“I don’t know what happened and I know it might not be my place to say anything but… He’s heartbroken. And weird. And it’s like he’s oozing coldness. He’s never been the cheery-smiley type to begin with but after he met you, he seemed so happy. And now it’s worse than before.”

Aziraphale watched the steam erupting from his tea, not really sure what to say. 

“I’m sure whatever it is that made you two stop talking to each other, it can be dealt with. And we’ll all help! We missed you at rehearsals today,” Gwen continued. 

“Oh, my dear. This is beyond not talking to each other. And I’m afraid it’s beyond fixing,” the angel said and looked at the small figure sitting across of him. Gwen had a pleading look in their eyes and it hurt Aziraphale to see them like this but there was no way they could work this out. 

“Why?”, Gwen whispered, knuckles whitening around their cup. 

“I can’t say. Sometimes people just can’t be together. No matter how much they wish they could. Some people are just not made for each other.”

*

“What happened?” Liam asked the demon who was staring into nothingness. 

“Huh?” he answered even though he didn’t fool either of them playing dumb. Liam just stayed quiet and waited for a different answer. “If I stay with him, he’ll get hurt.”

Liam squeezed Crowley’s shoulder and for the first time today, he looked at him. “There’s always a risk of someone getting hurt. That’s… That’s love I guess. It takes courage. You have to be ready to get hurt.”

Crowley felt his composure crumble. “I would take all of his pain if it meant he’d be alright, but there’s no way. This is different, Liam. I can’t protect him.”

“Sometimes you can’t protect the people you love. You can only help them through their hard times…” Both Liam and Crowley raised their heads when they heard Alex’ words. The man sat down next to Liam and took his hand, lacing their fingers together. 

“I can protect him. If I stay away from him.”

*

“How did it go?” Violet asked Gwen when they came back to the room they shared in the theatre building. They shook their head, traces of tears on their cheeks. Violet jumped up and pulled them into a hug, just holding on. None of them said a word. 

“Violet…” Gwen broke the silence finally and the girl with dyed black hair let go of them to be able to look at their face. 

“What is it?”, she asked, brushing away a single tear with her thumb. Gwen’s cheeks reddened. 

“I love you. I love you so much. I’ve had the biggest crush on you ever since I first saw you and fucking hell, you look fantastic in shorts.”

Violet opened her mouth in surprise, then broke into laughter, pulling Gwen back in her arms. 

“I love you too. And that last part was so random.” 

They both laughed, still hugging. 

“Aziraphale said, some people are not meant to be together. That’s not us, right?” Gwen asked after they had calmed down. 

Violet shook her head. “No. And it’s not them either. They’ll see. Everything will be alright. Everything will be alright, Gwen.” 

“Oh, fair Beatrice,” they said bursting into laughter again, silenced by the kiss Violet pulled them into. 

*

Crowley was lying on the ground. It was five in the morning and his bed had felt too soft, the sofa too uncomfortable so the ground seemed to be the most sensible option. 

“What is that cruel punishment,” he asked, to no one in particular “Make me fall. Make me a demon. But making me fall in love with an angel that’s just… I can only handle so much.”

Maybe his eyes flicked upwards, accusing a God that had long left him. Maybe he was just talking to himself. 

Memories from his fall made him shiver and he closed his eyes. 

“Why can’t I be mortal? Why can’t I be with him? I never asked to be a demon. I never asked to be loved. All I ask for, is to be able to give love. You can take heaven from me. You can take my soul from me. But please. Don’t take him.”

He didn’t know what he expected. He didn’t get an answer. Of course he didn’t. 

*

Aziraphale didn’t know what made him take that walk. He just knew he needed to breathe. And his bookshop seemed to be suffocating him. He just stepped outside and started walking and suddenly found himself in front of the theatre building, his fist raised to knock on the door. But the door opened before he had a chance to do so and he was standing face to face with Crowley. 

“Angel,” the demon whispered. 

“Crowley,” Aziraphale replied. 

“What are you doing outside at this time of day?” Crowley asked, clearing his throat. 

“I could ask you the same thing. Uhm. I was going to take a walk. Would you… Would you like to join me, perhaps?” 

Crowley nodded slowly and the angel took a step aside to let him through the door. They simply started walking, no special direction in mind. 

“Gwen visited me tonight.”

The streetlights were too bright for the demon’s liking so he dimmed them. “Did they?” he asked, as casual as possible. His heart was almost beating out of his chest, every time Aziraphale’s arm brushed against his. 

“Yes. We had a long conversation. All of the kids are… So kind. Good people. You certainly had quite the impact on them, my dear.”

Crowley stopped walking. It took Aziraphale a moment to notice, they were standing a bit further apart when he turned to check on the demon.

“Don’t. Don’t do that to me.”

“Do what?”

Crowley walked closer. “Act like nothing happened. You’re not stupid.”

“I- I’m sorry,” Aziraphale began to stutter “I don’t know what you mean, Crowley. We’re still neighbours. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

The demon grabbed him by his coat and pressed him into the nearest wall, hands shaking and heart racing. 

“We’re not just neighbours,” he hissed and he swore, he knew he shouldn’t but what was so wrong about stealing one kiss? What was so wrong about leaning forward, just the tiniest bit, breathing in the angel’s scent and connecting their lips? What was so wrong about love?

He couldn’t bring himself to take this tiny step. But Aziraphale could. 

The angel pulled the demon towards himself, connecting their lips, soft, careful, shy. Crowley kissed back, impatient, passionate, hurt. And when the angel pulled away, he let go of his coat and hid his face in Aziraphale’s shoulder, sobbing. 

“We can’t- I shouldn’t have- I’m sorry," the angel stammered and Crowley just held onto him tighter. 

One taste. One kiss. That was what he told himself. Kiss him goodbye. He didn't know that his scent, his touch, his lips would be addictive. Finding himself wishing he had never tasted them while yearning to never quit tasting them. 

"Please, my love, don't cry," Aziraphale whispered, lifting Crowley's chin with his hand "Please don't."

That was when he started to kiss the tears that kept falling away, the softest, most caring kisses, turning Crowley into a puddle of his own feelings. 

"Why?" the demon stared at the angel, at his sunshine kissed locks, his gleaming eyes. "Why do you like me back?" 

Aziraphale felt his heart shatter in his chest upon hearing Crowley's words. "Because you're gorgeous. You're kind. You're smart. You have so much heart. And you do everything you do with a passion I can't even begin to explain. You're fast and honest and forgiving and I love you. I love you so much. I've never loved anyone so much."

"Why do you keep saying that?" the demon still had his hands on Aziraphale's chest. 

"Because if I'm going to fall I want to make sure it's for the best reason possible. Because if I have to fall to be with you, so be it."

Crowley's eyes widened in horror and he shook his head, letting go, stumbling back. 

"What is going on, Crowley? Is this not what you wanted?" the blond asked, helpless. 

"I don't want you to fall. I never wanted anyone to fall but especially not you. You don't know what it does to you. You don't know what it means to be damned, to be unforgivable to have God stop talking to you. I don't want that for you. I don't want you to feel your wings going up in flames. I don't want you to experience this fall, downwards, the ground coming closer and closer and you can't turn away and it twists your stomach and it brings tears to your eyes and then you've fallen and you're hurt and alone, I don't want that for you. I don't want any demons having their way with you because you're 'fresh meat', I don't want you to get used by Lucifer for whatever sick idea he has in mind. I won't let that happen."

The demon had paled and felt like he was suffocating upon the memories resurfacing. He fell to his knees, gasping for air, desperate and hurt. His mind was spinning and screaming at him to protect the angel but also to accept his comforting touch and it all became too much. 

Aziraphale rushed to his side, unsure of what to do, unsure of what to say. Crowley was shaking, memories of his fall flashing before his inner eye, a terrible migraine pounding in his head. 

“I’m sorry!” the angel said, bending down to touch Crowley’s shoulder who flinched away like a hurt animal. 

Aziraphale lifted his hands to show he wasn’t going to touch him again and looked him in the eyes. “It’s okay. You’re here, with me. Nothing bad can happen to you. This will pass. It’s okay, you’re okay. Breathe.”

He kept mumbling until he saw the demon getting calmer, breathing still fast and shallow but the panicked expression on his face was almost gone. “Can I touch you?” Aziraphale asked, still in the same, crouched position. Crowley nodded, just the smallest movement, barely able to spot, and the angel took the demon’s hands in his. 

“I’m really sorry. I didn’t know… Of course, this must be a painful memory. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

Crowley closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. “What do you feel?” Aziraphale raised his eyebrows in confusion. 

“Sorry?”

“What do you feel? Do you still hold on to this mad plan of yours? Do you think of leaving? Staying? What’s on your mind, angel?”

The blond let himself fall into a sitting position, not sure what to reply. They stayed quiet for a bit. He looked down at their hands, fingers still interlaced. 

“I think… I think I love you. And that probably means I have to leave.”

Crowley’s grip on his hands tightened. “Please don’t. Stay. Stay with me. This works. We can make it work. No one has to know. I… I love y-”

The demon was silenced by a sudden kiss. His heart jumped but only for how long it lasted, as the minute they parted, he saw it in Aziraphale’s eyes. The apology he didn’t dare to say out loud. 

“This isn’t goodbye, is it?” Crowley asked. 

Aziraphale let go of his hands, his wings appearing out of nowhere, so white and _clean_ they blinded the demon. “I don’t know what it is.”

Crowley was shaking his head, grasping for the angel’s hands, his touch, his presence but it was no use. No matter how tight you want to hold onto someone, at some point you realise, they were never yours to hold. 

*

“I can’t find my mask, someone please help me find my mask!” Violet was running around the backstage area, frantically looking for the missing part of her costume, when said missing part hit her against the head. She looked up, then rolled her eyes at Alex who grinned. 

“Found it!” 

“No need to throw it at me!”

They continued their banter but Gwen paid them no mind, instead walking over to Crowley. “Are you sure he’s not going to turn up? Curtain’s up in fifteen minutes. That’s plenty of time. Crowley smiled sadly, adjusting his sunglasses, shaking his head. “I’m sure he’ll turn up. Maybe super last minute with a really cliché rom-com thing, blasting a love song or something.”

“Can you please drop the subject? I don’t want to talk about it,” he hissed, regretting it immediately. “Sorry. I’m sorry.”

“Do you want a hug? I’m really good at giving hugs,” Gwen offered, not even waiting for Crowley’s response, instead wrapping their arms around him, squeezing him tightly.

“Group hug, guys!” Liam yelled and threw himself into the hug, only to be joined by the rest of the cast, a sighing demon in their midst. 

“Come on, guys, there’s a show to put on. Concentrate.”

They scattered as fast as they assembled. Liam nudged Crowley with his elbow, “Ten minutes. He’ll be there.”

*

He wasn’t. Crowley was staring at two empty seats in the third row, one his own, one Aziraphale’s. Not being able to bear being reminded of his absence, he preferred to stay backstage to watch the play. He couldn’t bring himself to stop staring at the door, a part of him desperately hoping it would swing open and reveal the angel. 

The door stayed shut. 

*

“You did amazing, kids. Keep up the good work for the second half. Alex, get your mic checked, your sound was off. Gwen, you should be in the wardrobe. Liam, stop torturing the fake plants and grab yourself a bottle of water, you look like you ran a marathon.”

The whole backstage area was vibrating and full of energy and Crowley was so glad. He actually stopped thinking about Aziraphale for a whole thirty minutes. 

“Curtain in five, kids. You got this,” he announced the second part and everyone got ready. And Crowley’s eyes wandered back to the door.

*

Gwen and Violet were on stage, Violet hiding her face, tears running down her cheeks, Gwen coming closer. “ _Lady Beatrice, have you wept all this while?_ ” 

“ _Yea, and I will weep a while longer_ ,” Violet replied. 

“ _I will not desire that_ ,” came Gwen’s response. 

They continued their scene, so many emotions shared between them, they managed to draw Crowley’s eyes away from the door, completely focused on their acting.

“ _Is there any way to show such friendship?_ ” Gwen asked, a hand on Violet’s shoulder. 

“ _A very even way, but no such friend._ ”

The smallest bit of light fell upon Crowley as someone entered the theatre, closing the door behind them softly to not disturb the audience. 

“ _I do love nothing in the world so well as you: is not that strange?_ ” Gwen confessed as Benedick, visibly torn over their feelings. 

Violet’s Beatrice didn’t give in that easily “ _As strange as the thing I know not. It were as possible for me to say I loved nothing so well as you: but believe me not; and yet I lie not; I confess nothing, nor I deny nothing. I am sorry for my cousin._ ” 

“ _By my sword, Beatrice, thou lovest me._ ”

Crowley bit his bottom lip.

“ _Do not swear, and eat it._ ”

The audience laughed. 

“ _I will swear by it that you love me; and I will make him eat it that says I love not you,_ ” Gwen drew their sword and waved it around, no specific target in mind. 

“ _Will you not eat your word?_ ”

“ _With no sauce that can be devised to it. I protest I love thee._ ”

Crowley felt an arm brush his. He turned around to face Aziraphale, wearing his regular clothes with the same, calm and at peace smile on his face that made Crowley fall in love with him in the first place.

“ _Why, then, God forgive me!_ ” Violet gasped dramatically.

“What are you doing here?” Crowley asked, as quiet as possible. 

“I couldn’t miss this, could I?” 

“You’re late!”

Aziraphale nodded, apologising.

Gwen took Violet’s hand. “ _What offence, sweet Beatrice?_ ” 

“I don’t want to leave. I don’t want to live a life without you. I can’t live a life without you. I shouldn’t have left and I’m sorry,” the angel whispered, earning a “Shh!” from Liam.

“ _You have stayed me in a happy hour: I was about to protest I loved you,_ ” Violet whispered, before breaking into laughter. Gwen joined her “ _And do it with all thy heart._ ”

Aziraphale turned around so he was only facing Crowley now. “Can you forgive me, and, more important, do you take me back?”

“ _I love you with so much of my heart that none is left to protest,_ ” Violet caressed Gwen’s cheek. 

“I love you with so much of my heart that none is left to protest,” Crowley quoted, turning around to face Aziraphale, while Gwen and Violet started fighting over Claudio’s, in their case Liam’s, fate. 

“It’s very rude to talk during a play,” Alex whispered when Aziraphale took Crowley’s hand in his, the eyes, so full of doubt and fear before suddenly filled with nothing but love. 

“Then shut up!” Crowley hissed back, a smile on his face and Alex chuckled. 

“ _Enough, I am engaged; I will challenge him. I will kiss your hand, and so I leave you. By this hand, Claudio shall render me a dear account. As you hear of me, so think of me. Go, comfort your cousin: I must say she is dead: and so, farewell,_ ” Gwen made their exit and so did Violet. 

“Told you he’d show up,” they said, nodding in Aziraphale’s direction, grinning. 

“I wouldn’t have missed it for the world,” Aziraphale replied, still looking at Crowley. 

*

“What changed?” Crowley asked, sitting on an empty stage, Aziraphale leaning against his shoulder. 

“Nothing. And that’s the thing. Nothing changed. All I did was feeling miserable without you. I still love you. And I will continue to love you, no matter how much distance I bring between us.”

They kept quiet for a while, drinking in the room where only hours before almost all seats were filled with people, the stage that the rather small cast stood on, the spotlight that wasn’t on anymore. 

“What about… Falling?” Crowley disrupted the silence. Aziraphale lifted his head and looked at the demon, a mysterious smile on his face. With the snap of his fingers, the spotlight lit up again and dipped the stage in a warm, white light. He helped Crowley to his feet, twirled him around, small circles, round and round until they both broke into laughter. 

“What’s gotten into you?” the demon whispered after the angel pulled him back to his chest, holding him close. 

“I already did.”

“Fall?”

Crowley seemed to try and pull away but didn’t find the strength in himself to actually do, so he just avoided Aziraphale’s eyes, looking at their shoes in the bright light. 

“Not in the literal sense, no, don’t worry. It sure felt like falling, however. Coming back here. Facing you. After I left. I walked and walked as if something was pulling me, gravitation, I don’t know. That’s what it feels like, being with you. I get pulled in, more and more and at first I thought it felt like drowning, a heavy weight on my lungs but then I realised, not being with you, that’s drowning. Because I kept gasping for air, for your touch, your company but it was never enough. But right this second, it’s the opposite. You shifted the weight. You lightened it so much that I stopped sinking, stopped being pulled back under water again and again and I came out on top.”

Aziraphale wiped a single tear from Crowley’s cheek, hitting the sunglasses lightly before taking them off the demon. 

“The only things I want to drown in, are your eyes.”

Crowley laughed dryly, turning away, only for a second but got serious again, seeing Aziraphale’s expression. He was standing there, offering his innermost thoughts, so vulnerable, so honest. 

“I missed you,” he answered, returning the honesty “There’s so much bad in this world, sometimes it feels like impenetrable mist, darkness, all grey and no end in sight. The kids lighten the way. And you cleared the clouds. I can bear the sight of the sky again. Because of you.”

Aziraphale’s half smile broke into a genuine one and Crowley couldn’t help himself, surging forward to kiss him, nipping on his bottom lip, just a little, melting into the touch. For a brief moment there was nothing else, no stage, no theatre, no heaven or hell, just this. Aziraphale. His heartbeat. The warmth of his body against his own. The shivers the angel’s hands sent down his back, fingertips slightly curling on the back of his neck before they wandered to his hair, no clear destination in mind. 

They didn’t know where they were headed and what obstacles they’d have to face along the way but in this moment, when Crowley broke their kiss, gasping for air before diving back in, it didn’t matter and it never would, because they were going to face the world together. Come hell and high water.

*

“Just for the record, I still think this is ridiculous,” Alex complained, fixing a string of lights in ghost shapes on a doorframe of one of the theatre’s doors. Liam knocked their hips together. “Don’t be such a spoilsport, isn’t it great to spend the holidays with a group sharing so many different beliefs?”

Liam looked around the room, to the various light strings, decorated trees, over to a single menorah, Violet carrying Incense and an arm full of books. 

“I get the Christmas part, the lights, the decorations and I’m all here for practising your religion and stuff, especially seeing how happy Oscar was but what’s up with the Halloween decorations? And don’t even get me started on Jedi. That’s a made up religion.”

“All religions are made up,” Gwen replied, throwing tinsel in various places. “Words are made up too. Doesn’t make them bad. Quite the reverse. Words are the single most powerful thing in existence. Words was all it took to bring these two stubborn idiots together.”

Gwen pointed at Crowley and Aziraphale, who were sitting on a sofa under a mistle tree, both a cup of cocoa in one hand, the other’s hand in the other one, too deep in their conversation to notice anything around them. 

“I wasn’t- Can someone explain the Halloween decorations, please?!” Alex protested.

Liam pulled him under the ghost lights and kissed him. 

“Works the same way a sprig of mistletoe does,” the brunette let his boyfriend know, who shook his head, rolling his eyes. “Rubbish.”

“Oh, I guess I’ll have to get myself someone who believes in the magic of Halloween then, maybe an attractive young man who will apologise with a spiced cocoa and another string light kiss…”

Liam turned away before getting pulled into another kiss. “Blackmail. That’s what that is,” Alex took his hand and they went over to the bar. Violet set down her books and Incense and wrapped her arms around Gwen’s hips, kissing their cheek. 

“Happy Holidays,” she whispered and laughed when Gwen started putting tinsel on her as well. “Happy Holidays. Can’t remember the last time I’ve been this happy around this time of year.”

Violet’s reply got lost when Crowley called the kids to the front of the room. The group had grown visibly, from the same small circle of the four that were Violet, Alex, Gwen and Liam to a handful more, Oscar who had turned up in November, bringing original plays and one hell of a backstory to unpack, Damien who regularly invited the entire group to Lunch, Daisy and Meredith, Jaimee and Kai. They sat down on whatever furniture they could find, most of them quite comfortable on the carpeted ground, spread around the sofa. 

Liam was laying with his head in Alex’ lap, looking at the bookshop and theatre owners in expectancy. 

“First of all, we’d like to thank you all for being here with us. Trusting us. Sharing your stories with us and allowing us to be part of them,” Aziraphale began, after everyone had settled in. He had started giving out hot drinks that everyone accepted thankfully. Crowley took over. 

“When I opened up this place, I didn’t really know what I was doing. I’m only saying this once, however, because it’s only meant to be heard by you guys. I wanted to make a place that feels like home for those who are having a hard time. It’s not like you’re outcasts, no. You’re amazing. You’re brilliant. Your minds are art and your souls are kind. Sometimes society has a hard time adapting to that. But this is why this theatre exists. It’s supposed to be a room for all your ideas, your miracles and wonders. But first and most importantly, a home.”

“You did amazing, love,” Aziraphale whispered, when he noticed Crowley having troubles continuing. The demon smiled lightly before he continued. 

“Seconding what my angel just said. Thank you for sharing your stories with us. Thank you for being part of ours as well. I love you all. And at one point you are going to move on and that’s perfectly normal. But no matter what happens, this place will always be here.”

Aziraphale nodded. “As well as the bookshop. We will always be here for you.”

A few of the group members wiped tears away, Gwen hid their face in Violet’s hair. 

“Keep creating art. Keep being you. You’re amazing. Merry Christmas. Happy Hanukkah. Happy Halloween. And whatever holiday I might have forgotten to mention.”

“Happy Made-up-Holiday,” Liam yelled, almost spilling his cocoa, lifting his mug in excitement. “Happy Made-up-Holiday,” the rest of the group agreed and started clinking mugs.

“We should take a picture together!” Violet jumped up, set down her cocoa on the floor and ran off, reappearing after not even a minute, holding a camera in one hand and a tripod in the other. She set them up and directed people to sit in certain spots so they would all fit. They ended up surrounding the sofa Crowley and Aziraphale were sitting on.

“Ready?” Violet asked, not waiting for a response and setting the self-timer. She threw herself on Gwen’s lap right before they heard the sound of the shutter. They took a few more, just to make sure, some just for fun and some just for the opportunity to make fools out of the angel and the demon. 

“That’s the best not-Christmas I’ve ever had. Can’t wait for not-New-Year’s-Eve,” Oscar said, eyes glimmering in the light of the fairy lights. 

“Maybe we should do this every year. It’s nice. Never celebrated it before,” Aziraphale turned to face his partner, squeezing his hand lightly, “Hey, are you okay?”

Crowley nodded, biting his lip. 

“I have never felt this much love before. I love you, angel. I love you.”

“I promise, there will never come a day you’ll feel less loved than right now again. I’ll make sure. I love you too. And you deserve to be loved as well, my dear. My demon. You deserve just as much love as anyone else in this room.”

They didn’t have snow until three days later but decorations were still up anyway and when Gwen and Violet held up the printed and framed group picture, when Liam and Alex started arguing about which nails to use for the walls, when Jaimee accidentally hammered a hole in the wall, Crowley knew, not only had he created a home for these people, but also for Aziraphale and himself. 

And over the years the walls filled with more and more group pictures, changing people, different faces, various new and old decorations, but one thing never changed. Crowley and Aziraphale, on the sofa in the midst of them, holding hands, hopelessly in love with each other. 

And humanity.

**Author's Note:**

> As always, comments and kudos make my day, if you're looking for more of my writing, check out my other fics and you can always yell at/with me on twitter (@ajayalive). I'm always here for discussing ineffable idiots. Or Shakespeare.
> 
> AJ


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